I hung up the phone and started to cry. I was alone in my room so that I could speak to the doctor’s office privately. I could hear my son starting to meltdown and my husband trying to help him in the next room. But I couldn’t move. I could not open that bedroom door and… Continue reading Neurological Evaluations and Diagnosis: What I Wish Someone Had Told Me
When my son kicked the windshield, I didn’t think it would break. I was wrong. Apparently, the force of losing all rational thought and ability was enough to crack it from end to end. He was crying, flailing and screaming at me. “I can’t do it. Mommmmeeeeeeeee. I can’t. I can’t go in.” We were… Continue reading Why Is My Child So Explosive?
There are eleven separate chronic diagnoses between my two children. Seven times I have sat in a beige room on a beige couch and heard a doctor say the words I knew were coming, but still didn’t want to hear. Your child has… Autism Bipolar Disorder, Type 1 Anxiety Disorder ADHD Sensory Processing Disorder Lupus… Continue reading 10 Must-Read Books For Parenting A Child With Special Needs
When I was in high school, I learned about Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’s Five Stages of Grief (the stages we go through when we are processing a significant loss or change). It was part of an assignment for a speech I was working on in debate class. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance I still have them… Continue reading Grieving My Child’s Diagnosis
I was chatting with a younger momma recently who asked me to share some tips and tricks for motherhood. She said she thought our life, and all it’s crazy, might have taught me a few things that she could apply in her life as well (with or without special needs). She’s right. Most of the… Continue reading What Being A ‘Special Needs’ Mom Has Taught Me About Just Plain Being A Mom
You might be the worst mom ever. How could you let him play Minecraft that long? Did you even think about what vegetable to serve for dinner tonight? He can’t have that much sugar. Why did you say yes to the candy bar? You’re choosing easy over what is right, again. Why didn’t you sign… Continue reading Giving Ourselves Grace
I leaned over the kitchen counter, my head in my hands, and tried to take a few deep breaths. The house was a disaster, I hadn’t finished reading lessons my youngest in three days, I was still in my pj’s at 11AM, and my eleven year old was melting down over not being able to buy… Continue reading Lies I Believe About Being A “Special Needs Mom”
Since the day my first baby was born, I have felt responsible for my children’s differences. Not responsible in the “I’m the momma so I need to help my child” kinda way (although I certainly feel that too). Responsible in the “Why do you let him sleep with you instead of in the crib, eat… Continue reading Blaming Parents Of Children With Special Needs
My oldest son was diagnosed with autism when he was just shy of ten years old. But he has lived with it his entire life. From a few days old until today, at age fourteen, my son has been teaching me all about autism. Sometimes, it’s really, really difficult. Sometimes, he takes my breath away… Continue reading When Your Child Has Autism
“It feels like our lives are totally out of control. And there is nothing I can do about it,” my husband replied. I looked at my son’s doctor, wondering what she might say. She looked down at her paper and wrote something. I glanced at my husband, and gave him a weak smile. “He’s not… Continue reading The Constant Vigilance Of Parenting A Child With Special Needs
He threw the book and stomped off to his room. “Don’t you understand?” he yelled, clearly frustrated. “I have dys-A-lexia!” As he slammed the door, I tried to sort through all my reactions – smiling because of the way he pronounced dyslexia, bitter because he threw the book and we have been trying to help… Continue reading Just Because It’s Difficult, Doesn’t Mean You are Doing it Wrong
This post was originally published on Not The Former Things in 2014. After reading two books last week, my sweet son was thrilled. I was thrilled. We all were thrilled. But this week, basic words are a struggle again. He sees the words. He knows he used to know them. But his brain just can’t… Continue reading Momma, Why Can’t I Read?
It is officially the week we collectively give thanks. It’s good. It’s right. It’s tradition. And sometimes…it feels completely impossible. (This post originally appeared here on Not The Former Things in November of 2014. It feels like much has changed, and yet, as I read own words below, I am struck by how much is… Continue reading When Being Thankful Feels Impossible
It’s Sunday morning. How many families are fighting to get their kids out the door today, and into that Sunday school classroom? When I was a single mom, I used to look at the clock on a Sunday morning and count down the hours and minutes until my sons would be checked in to their… Continue reading Why Does Sunday School Have to be School?